Sarah was doing her usual “get ready for work” ritual: pull on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt and quickly pull a hairbrush through her shoulder-length auburn hair. Coffee percolator was plugged in, switched on and semi-drinkable beverage obtained. The PC in the corner of her living room/home office was coaxed into life and she was now casually browsing through some emails and newsgroups before settling down to work.

Sarah had been working from home three days out of five for the past year. She was a web designer with a small firm which didn’t pay particularly well, but what it lacked in financial reward it more than made up for in flexibility and interest. The two days a week she had to go into the office for meetings/updates could be a little tedious sometimes, but mostly they didn’t care what hours you did as long as the deadlines were met. That suited her down to the ground and she didn’t envy anyone who had to do a traditional nine to five slog no matter how they were feeling or what was on daytime TV.

The phone rang, making her jump. She glanced at her watch: only nine thirty in the morning. Unlikely to be the office as no-one would be in until ten at the earliest. She frowned and checked the caller ID before picking up.

“Hi Sue, what’s up? Not at work yet?”

The caller on the other end of the phone laughed. “I never get used to you having caller ID, Sarah, you catch me out every single time it’s very unnerving!”

“Well I like to keep my callers on their toes.”

They both knew the real reason Sarah had caller ID was to screen calls from a certain ex-boyfriend psycho, but always politely avoided mentioning Ben wherever possible. All that had to be said was said a very long time ago before the change of address, telephone numbers and restraining order. It was a territory even best friends didn’t wander into without very good justification.

Sue continued. “So, not an office day today then? Is it a ‘slog your guts out for a deadline’ home working day or a ‘loaf around then catch up in a mad panic around midnight’ home working day?”

Sarah frowned. What was Sue doing at home? Was she sick? She’d hardly ever known Sue to take a sick day, she was far too dedicated to her work for her own good. “You okay? Want me to come over? What’s happened?”

“I don’t really want to talk about it over the telephone – see you in a bit?”

“Sure. Be there in about thirty minutes.”

Sarah replaced the handset and glanced at her coffee. Oh well, it wasn’t a particularly good cup anyway. She must remember not to buy the cheapest coffee grounds on special next time. She threw on a coat and ransacked the flat for her shoes and handbag, reluctant to waste any time on trivialities when this was the first time her friend had ever requested to see her on a working day. Oh sure, there’d been times when they’d snuck in a long lunch on a slow Friday, but mostly Sue was too diligent. It must be something pretty serious – had the wife of the guy Sue was going out with found out about their relationship? Thrown him out? That would have made Sue pretty pissed off but she couldn’t see that it would be enough to stop her going to work. Well she would find out soon enough, she thought as she finally located her keys and went out to do battle with the London buses.

Pretty much on the dot of the half hour she’d promised, Sarah was on the doorstep of Sue’s apartment block, ringing the doorbell. She’d stopped off on the way to pick up two steaming hot cappuccinos and some cinnamon buns, mindful that she’d not had her caffeine hit yet that morning and knowing full well that Sue’s idea of a good cup of coffee involved a jar of instant freeze-dried that had been hiding in the back of the cupboard for over a year. The intercom buzzed and she pushed open the door and started her ascent to Sue’s flat.

Sue was waiting for her at the door.

“Hi,” Sarah said brightly and indicated the goodies on the cardboard tray and polystyrene cups, “thought I’d bring us some breakfast.

She watched concerned as Sue’s already pale face turned an attractive shade of green at the smell of the coffee and followed her inside dropping off the tray on the nearest surface as Sue bolted towards the bathroom. Watching Sue dry-retch into the toilet bowl light suddenly dawned.

Sue straightened herself up, flushed the loo and splashed some cold water on her face. After she’d finished patting her face on a fluffy peach towel she gave Sarah a wry smile. “I’m pregnant,” she said by way of explanation.

“I’d worked that much out, yes. Peter?”

“Uh huh. Who else? I’m not that much of a slut.”

Sarah grinned. “Come on, let’s go sit down somewhere comfy to sort this one out. I’ll even make the supreme sacrifice and forgo my morning caffeine for you.”

Relieved that finally there was someone she could talk to, someone to advise her and hold her hand through the difficult choices to come, Sue moved towards the living room. She waved her hand in the general direction of the kitchen, “you can drink your coffee if you like, you know. I’m over the worst I think – it was just the initial shock of the smell.”

“Nah, I’m okay, I’ll survive. You been this sick for long?”

“No, only since yesterday. I’d been feeling queasy before that but not actually been sick.”

“Have you told Peter yet?”

Sue nodded and pulled a face. “Yes, I eventually managed to tell him last night. He was supposed to come over for the whole evening but something had cropped up at work so he only managed to come over for an hour.”

Sarah raised her eyebrow at this. She’d never fully trusted Peter – her opinion was that any man that was prepared to lie to his wife was more than capable of lying to his mistress as well. She knew better than to get into that can of worms right now though.

Sue ignored the gesture, knowing what Sarah was thinking but carried on regardless. “I was so cross, I’d planned out exactly what I’d wanted to say and when to say it and in the end I just blurted out the whole speech over dinner. It was embarrassing, he’d brought me all my favourite dishes from the local Chinese and I couldn’t manage a mouthful. It was all I could do to stop myself running to the bathroom.”

“Sod the food, what did he say? How did he react?”

“Well, he looked really tired – he’d obviously had a really bad day and I felt guilty that I was about to make it a hell of a lot worse. I don’t think he even heard half of what I said the first time around. Had to repeat in words of one syllable to get him to understand.”

“Shit! What happened then?”

Sue shifted her eyes from Sarah’s at this point. She knew how her loyal friend was going to react at this and she wasn’t looking forward to it. She knew she deserved the lecture, knew she had been irresponsible, but still. You didn’t need to hear what an idiot you’d been from the girl you’d known since kindergarten, did you?

“Not much. He was a bit shell-shocked really. We continued our meal in virtual silence. Well, when I say we… I mean he. If I couldn’t eat much before the outburst, there was no way I was going to be able to afterwards. I kept hoping he’d say something, anything… even if it was anger, but nothing. At the end of the meal he helped clear up and muttered that he had to get back home as it was getting late, gave me a peck on the cheek and left.”

“The utter, utter BASTARD!” Sarah was flabbergasted. She’d never thought much of that man but would have expected at least some concern or sympathy from him. Her estimation plummeted to new depths.

Sue shrugged. She couldn’t really defend him, she’d hoped to get a bigger reaction from him, even if it was a negative one. At the same time, it had been a big shock to her and she’d had more time to get used to the idea. He’d had no time yet to acclimatise to the information. People always reacted completely differently to shock and it was unfair to expect concern and sympathy when, as far as she knew, he may even suspect her of foul play despite her insistence that she wanted an abortion and no help from him in any way. She wondered if their relationship would survive the crisis but at the moment it was too early to tell and there were far more pressing concerns.

“So, what are you going to do? Have you decided yet?” Sarah’s voice broke her reverie.

“I don’t want it, Sarah. I’m not cut out to be a mother, and even if I was it’s the wrong time of my life, with the wrong man and in the wrong situation. There is no way I can have this baby.”

Sarah sensed there was more. “But?”

Sue sighed, “but the whole idea terrifies me. I don’t really know what to expect. I mean do I see my GP? Are there centres you can just walk into, pay your money, and come out without child? Will it… will it hurt?”

Sarah gave her friend a huge hug. “One thing at a time hon, one thing at a time. If you want me to be at any or all of the appointments, you know you just have to ask, don’t you?”

Sue nodded.

“I do think you ought to see your GP for referral though rather than go to a clinic. Surely it would be better as if there were any complications she’d already know the background? I mean, you’re not a teenage kid trying to hide the truth from her parents, you’re an adult and your contraception has failed.”

“I know, you’re right. It’s just I only ever see my GP about once a year if I really can’t avoid going and even then she seems to make me feel like I’m completely wasting her time. Not the most approachable of people. I’ll try and make an appointment with her as soon as possible. Which days are you working from home at the moment?”

“Oh don’t worry about that, if it coincides with an office day I’ll just call in sick.”

Sue’s eyes welled up with tears at her friend’s kindness. Two days ago she’d felt completely utterly alone and overwhelmed, but now she started to see that it wasn’t a hopeless situation, that she could get through this.

“Thanks Sarah,” she said, wiping her eyes. “Oh God, I’m such a selfish cow. I completely forgot to ask. How did your weekend in the Cotswolds with … um…”

“Adam”

“…your weekend in the Cotswolds with Adam go? Found Mr Right?”

Sarah laughed a bitter laugh. “God no. It was pretty dire. I thought we were doing pretty well – him inviting me to a romantic weekend away, a chance to do a bit of sightseeing, and spend some quality intimate time together if you know what I mean!”

“It didn’t go to plan?”

“No it didn’t! The cad took me to the cheapest grottiest hotel in the middle of nowhere he could find and then expected us to stay in there 24/7. I didn’t see ANY of the Cotswolds – not that I expected intensive sightseeing, but still! In a better quality hotel I probably wouldn’t have minded that much.”

“Oh dear.”

“Oh it gets worse. We ended up having a blazing row, so he stormed out and left me to pay for everything! Maybe we should both admit that we’re destined for a life of celibacy?”

Now it was Sue’s turn for a bitter laugh. “I hate to break it to you sweetheart, but I’m pretty certain they’re not going to be welcoming me with open arms at the convent.”