This is being slightly hampered by the fact that we’re down to the last rotting banana and random stuff in the fridge that looks as if it might walk out by itself soon, as next week’s grocery shopping is due to be delivered this evening.

I have also completely run out of Plumathon remains now (well, except for the stuff that still has another 7 weeks to mature, and I’m not convinced that partaking of the plum liqueur in the middle of the day is really going to help anything). This is a shame, as a piece of plum cake would go down a treat right now.

I might have to resort to raiding the kids’ Milky Way stash.

Unfortunately, the week they arrived I was still recovering from a nasty cold with an evil sore throat and completely deactivated taste-buds, so in the interests of a fair taste testing this blog post has been delayed somewhat. My apologies.

If you’re anything like me (a completely brand-oblivious person who spends most of their time in the supermarket in a zombie-like state) you’ll be wondering who NÖM are. Apparently, they are an Austrian dairy who have a UK dairy based in Shropshire. They are committed to using natural ingredients in all their products and have recently launched two new product ranges to the UK market: ‘Naturally Creamy’ – a split pot yoghurt similar to Müller’s Corner, and ‘Naturally Good’ – multipack yoghurts in smooth and layered varieties.

The first thing I noticed was how sophisticated the flavours seemed to be. In the ‘Naturally Creamy’ selection I was sent Senga Strawberry, Alphonso Mango & Passionfruit, Morello Cherry, Granola and Granola with Belgian Choc Chip. I assumed I would love the Morello Cherry and I wasn’t disappointed – a lovely rich yet natural cherry topping. The Mango & Passionfruit was equally delicious – both tart and sweet at the same time.

The Granola was surprisingly extremely good – I didn’t expect to like it at all, but it was rather nice (even without the additional Belgian chocolate – that made it even nicer!) – a bit like eating a crumbled up cereal bar with yoghurt. I could happily substitute my morning bowl of cereal with one of these.

My least favourite was the Senga Strawberry. To be fair, I am not a huge fan of strawberry-flavoured food items, I find them a bit too sweet and cloying. This variety wasn’t as sweet as some strawberry yoghurts but still felt a bit like eating a spoonful of jam with my yoghurt to me. I’m sure that this reflects my personal tastes rather than on the quality of the product, though.

I was also sent the two varieties of the ‘Naturally Good’ layered yoghurts: Morello Cherry and Senga Strawberry. These appeared to be the same flavours as the ‘Naturally Creamy’ split pots, only with a slightly thinner yoghurt and the fruit flavour at the bottom. I don’t usually buy layered yoghurts – mainly because the kids actively dislike them and I never saw the point in having all the flavour at the bottom. I usually end up just mixing it all up, by which point I may as well have bought a smooth-style yoghurt!

Ultimately though, these are a high-quality range with an appealing variety of flavours. I would definitely buy from the ‘Naturally Creamy’ range again in preference to their rivals, Müller Corners. Apparently they are available from Morrisons, but hopefully more supermarkets will follow suit soon.

Well, okay, I’d broken the catch on the locking mechanism a few months before and it had just been limping along the best it could, but the bowl did shatter rather spectacularly when Akra dropped it while washing up.

I half-heartedly looked for spare parts resellers, as I had done when the catch had broken, but hardly anyone seemed to stock them for that particular model and the few places that did were absurdly expensive. It made much more sense just to replace the whole thing.

I had two criteria: it had to be at least a 3L bowl, and I had to be able to chop, make pastry and grate/slice stuff.

After picking myself up off the floor in shock at how expensive some food processors can be, I quickly discovered that buying a white processor over a stainless steel finish one saved me about £60 (why?! That has to be a con, surely?). I got a mid-range model that did everything I wanted it to and had good reviews on Amazon.

It arrived this morning and I have a couple of thoughts about it. Firstly, the box it came in was HUGE! Bit of a shock when I was expecting a fairly compact model that would live on the kitchen counter. Fortunately, most of it was polystyrene packing. There was still a big box of accessories to find a home for in my kitchen cupboards, though.

Secondly, the recipe book that comes with it looks really good. I found myself flipping through the pages (fantasy cooking, as you do) and then started to really regret not having bought the all-singing all-dancing posher model (which, of course, the recipe book also catered for). If only, I’d spent more money and got one with the juicer, the chocolate grater and all the extra fancy blades!

Then I remembered that I’d had all those extra accessories on my old food processor and they’d gathered dust in the back of a cupboard for years. I only ever used the dough blade, the chopping blade, a grating disk and a slicing disk. That was it.

I’ve put the recipe book safely away on my cookery book shelf, now. I probably won’t look at that ever again, either.

In the end I chose Nigella’s Butter Cut-Out Biscuits from How To Be A Domestic Goddess – one of the best “I want something of no nutritional value, minimal effort, maximum effect and loads of calories” cookbooks I own.

As is traditional, I made a right mess of the kitchen while decorating them – I’ll be finding escaped hundreds and thousands for weeks. Still, it was fun, I got loads of appreciation from the family and they tasted divine too.

Must plan to be spontaneous more often.

Or something.

Normally our weekly shop for the four of us comes in at around £55-75 … pushing £80 if I’ve been a bit extravagant (or had every household cleaner run out at the same time).

Over the last month it has suddenly shifted to being between £75-90… sometimes pushing £95, yet I’ve been scouring the receipts and we’ve not been buying anything different or unusual to explain the dramatic increase.

I menu plan on a five week rota so theoretically our food bills should stay pretty steady. Going to have to reassess other household budgets if this is going to be a continued trend…

Last year’s Signature Egg was absolutely divine, so expectations were running high on opening the parcel, and I have to confess to feeling slightly disappointed when I saw that mine was completely dark chocolate – The Serious Dark Fix Egg. Great for the dark chocolate connoisseur in your life, but I admit I’m more of a milk chocolate lover myself.

The packaging gives the impression of high quality – understated but attractive with a matte and shiny black pattern on the box.

Removing the lid revealed a slip with a guide to the contents. A cut out in the shape of a keyhole giving a tantalising glimpse of the foil-wrapped egg.

Simple but elegant.

However, lifting away the keyhole cut-out card uncovered a moulded plastic container keeping the egg in place – similar to any found with the cheapest Nestle supermarket egg. I have to say that this marred the impression of quality and expense a little.

Still, I didn’t lose sight of the goal – the chocolate!

But again, I was to be disappointed with the presentation. The innards of the egg were sealed away under black waxed paper, almost as if they were embarrassed by them.

Opening this revealed a handful of chocolates – a reasonably generous amount compared to most commercial Easter eggs, but not the bursting at the seams feeling that last year’s Signature Egg gave.

The finish on the chocolates inside didn’t feel quite as exquisite as previously either with some knocking of the edges – perhaps due to movement during transit?

Where the egg didn’t disappoint was the shell. I remarked on this last year, but the thing Hotel Chocolat really excels at is a decently thick egg – not one that disintegrates if you breathe too heavily near it. It was an effort to snap the chocolate, and in the end I couldn’t break a small piece off to try it, but ended up splintering the whole side as you can see in the photo.

As a result, you get a proper taste of the chocolate and it is good. As I mentioned at the start of the review, I am not a fan of dark chocolate, yet this is rather nice. Heavy in cocoa and no trace of sweetness, it still manages to avoid the bitter after taste you can get with some dark chocolate. It’s smooth and … I’m almost inclined to say creamy, yet I know no cream or milk has touched it. It’s also rich – a few mouthfuls and I’m satisfied.

On balance, I would still reach for the milk chocolate out of choice, but this isn’t going to go to waste.

Of course, the review wouldn’t be complete without taking a look at the chocolate selection inside. I wasn’t able to sample all in time for this post (eating that many in one sitting would be guaranteed migraine-city, and I’m hoping to save the rest for Easter itself) but I did try the Délice de Chocolat – a chocolate with pistachios and hazelnuts in a rich filling. It was pleasant… for a nutty chocolate.

Yes, in the interests of fairness, I should point out that one of my other dislikes is nuts… no, it hasn’t really been my day. So really, I should have chosen another centre. However, the choice is rather limited in this particular offering – pretty much all of them contain nuts or are just a plain chocolate shape (the latter not being very exciting when you have a whole plain chocolate shaped egg to get through first).

Even allowing for my nut prejudice, it would have been nice to have had more variety in the selection – I remember looking through the “menu” of last year’s egg and really not knowing what to try first – the range was so enticing. This time round, it looks like I’d better get used to hazelnuts fast. Oh well.

So in summary, this is a high quality egg that dark chocolate (and nutty chocolate!) lovers will appreciate – a cut above the usual Easter offerings. Those who prefer milk chocolate would be well served to browse Hotel Chocolat’s other products in their Easter Gift collection.

However, I do feel that at £20 for an egg, I’d like to continue to see the Wow Factor and Pizazz that we had last year – in packaging, presentation and variety/quantity of contents. Even allowing for the fact that reviewer preference and product don’t seem to have been quite so well matched this time around, I can’t help feeling that there was something missing in the experience…

Remember, that you still have the opportunity to try and win an Extra Thick Easter Egg of your very own. Only 8 days left to enter!

The best thing about a Hotel Chocolat Easter egg is that the shell is so substantial – completely unlike the mainstream chocolate eggs which shatter if you so much as breathe in their direction.

I’m hoping to get one of their extra special, Extra Thick Easter eggs for review very shortly, but in the meantime I have a great competition for you to win one of your very own!

To enter, click here and simply answer six questions which will take you on an Easter egg hunt to find the secret code. Once you have answered each question, use the first letter of each answer to reveal the secret code. If you have found the right answer you stand a chance to win one of Hotel Chocolat’s stunning Extra Thick Easter Eggs!

One lucky UK reader of the Prattle will win an egg, so get cracking (boom boom tish) and enter quickly. The closing date is the 18th March, 2008.

[Insert drum roll here]

AND THE WINNER IS…

Congratulations, Pat. You should be receiving your prize in the next few days.

Many thanks to all who entered. Keep coming back, because you never quite know when the next competition might be just around the corner…

Though I did nearly fall off my chair when Akra Jr ate a single sprout. Shame he prefaced it with “I’m eating this first cos I HATE sprouts… THEY STINK” thus putting off his brother even trying it.

Anyway, this time I’ve been contacted and this time it’s even better – the goodies go to you rather than me!

Kinder Bueno are celebrating the launch of their new website, A Little Bit Of What You Fancy.

Here’s what they have to say about it:

Kinder Bueno, the purveyors of those permissible pods of chocolate pleasure, offer women a little bit of what they fancy. Their website offers tips on getting a little bit of what you fancy, and you can now find great advice on making the most of this party season. Whether you’re a pub girl, a clubber or a socialite, the experts will be on hand to advise you on how to get a little bit of what you fancy – with minimum fuss and effort.

They are also offering one lucky UK reader of Pewari’s Prattle a year’s supply of their delicious bars. For your chance to win, simply answer the following question:

The Kinder Bueno site (www.alittlebitofwhatyoufancy.com) asks visitors to choose what the best thing about Christmas is. What options do visitors have?

C – Family and prezzies

Simply email your answer to me at Pewari [AT] may [DOT] be (replace the words in square brackets with the obvious) with the subject line “KINDER BUENO COMPETITON” by 31st December 2007, and you might well be receiving a Kinder Bueno bar for each week of 2008!

Good luck!

Terms and conditions
The competition is open to UK residents only. The winner will be the first entry drawn at random after the closing date of 31st December and will win 52 Kinder Buenos.

I really didn’t think they were going to make it. The poor things got hardly any sunshine. It rained so much they got waterlogged and their leaves went brown and started dropping off. I found out too late that I was supposed to be offering them tomato feed (and in the end never bothered).

Despite all that, I’ve actually had a fairly decent crop out of them. Not enough to stop having to buy tomatoes in my weekly grocery shop, but enough that we’ve been having them at whim when I wouldn’t have bothered otherwise – having some fresh tomatoes with pizza one evening, or with our sandwiches.

Not only that, but my eyes have been opened to the FLAVOUR. So that’s what tomatoes are supposed to taste like, instead of the watery pap that usually passes for tomatoes.

So I’m encouraged – if I can get things to survive and get something useful off them, then anyone can. I can see the point to this sort of gardening. So I’m thinking of branching out next year.

I’ve bought myself this great book called Crops In Pots – okay, it’s probably more aspirational gardening than practical as it appears to have more glossy photographs than text, but to be honest I don’t want to be scared off by complicated instructions. I like the “bung it in pot and harvest” approach.

The only problem is – what to choose next year in addition to tomatoes? I’m tempted with some dwarf runner beans – but would I ever get enough at one picking to feed the four of us? Maybe I should grow sweet peppers instead – I only ever need one of those at a time…

Decisions, decisions.

… what a waste of sangria ingredients!

However, on this one I had some forewarning. A couple of weeks ago, I was sent an email asking if I would like to be sent a free Hotel Chocolat Signature Egg, in return for reviewing it here on the Prattle.

I have to confess I did a slight double-take at the implication that I might actually refuse free chocolate, but soon recovered from my shock, got in contact and sorted out details.

For the sake of transparency, I should at this point out that I am not in anyway affiliated with Hotel Chocolat, I don’t get squazillions of chocolate if you all rush out and buy one (more’s the pity) and I’m completely free to say what ever I like in the course of this review.

I just got to eat lots of luxury chocolate to give you the inside scoop – but you know how it is, I’m always prepared to go above and beyond the call of duty on your behalf. With that cleared up, on with the review…

I’d heard of Hotel Chocolat before, associated the name with a luxury chocolate brand, but had never got around to trying any of their products. Even so, when I received the parcel I couldn’t help but be impressed. Right from the start, the packaging just screams quality and high-class chocolate (in a very understated and refined way, of course).

I’m usually bitterly disappointed with Easter Eggs; after all the excitement and hype, you spend ages taking off about 20 layers of packaging, find a tiny little egg inside with wafer thin chocolate and if you’re lucky a minuscule little bag of sweets inside. Not so with the Signature egg.

On removing from the cardboard outer, the egg is reassuringly solid and heavy.

The egg itself is two distinct halves – one side plain chocolate and the other milk. The shell is thick and makes a nice substantial “crack” as you break a slab of chocolate away from it. The plain side is tart, without having that residual bitter after taste you get in some dark chocolates. The milk side is rich, creamy and substantial. No disappointment in sight.

But the most impressive part of all is the filling. The egg is crammed with mini “egg” truffles. All potently alcoholic. I’d describe them all to you, but they are very rich and I have eaten only the amaretto one which was divine. I shall be eking them out over several days so I can fully appreciate them and not get chocolate fatigue.

The only downside (you knew there’d be one, didn’t you?) is that at £19 plus postage, this is not a cheap Easter Egg. However, unlike the cheap and tacky ones stacked to the ceiling in Tescos, this egg really feels like it’s worth every penny.

If your budget still can’t quite stretch, then you may be glad to know that Hotel Chocolat are currently running a competition to win one of 20 Easter Hampers with enough goodies to make even the most hardened chocoholic squeal with joy. Visit The Online Easter Egg Hunt for more details – but hurry, I think the competition ends tonight…

For those who don’t know who Annabel Karmel is, she is a well-known cookbook author who shamed thousands of UK mothers into making their babies’ and children’s food from scratch.

Recommended by health visitors and parents alike, her recipes (while some tending to the fussy side and often requiring decorative flourishes) have coaxed many a fussy eater into the tastes of real fresh food and lured parents away from relying on expensive and nutrient-poor jars and pre-prepared food. She encouraged us that yes, we do have the time and the skills to do it properly.

So, to launch a range of ready meals seems somewhat … hypocritical, to say the least. While the ingredients and information on the range looks good (and I’ll be honest, we’ll probably end up trying at least one at some point in the future in an emergency), I do feel bizarrely let down by Ms Karmel. And the chicken rissoles we had this evening (in normal burger shapes, not teddies as recommended) were delicious but tainted.

Maybe we should all just give in and surrender every meal to Captain Birdseye?

Of course, it doesn’t actually stop me craving a really good chicken korma or a large portion of fish and chips though, I just find that the thought of a takeaway is so much nicer than the actual reality. So stumbling across these Fast Food recipes on BBC Food might just be the answer – at least I’ll know the exact quality of the ingredients going into them.