For the last three weeks, I’ve been working through The Artist’s Way – a 12-week course designed to help you become more creative. It had been recommended to me by a number of people so I decided it was time to give it a go and hopefully kick start my writing again.

So far, I have to confess that the author completely and utterly drives me up the wall. It’s not just a 12-week course, it’s written in the style of a 12-step programme treating the reader as if they were fighting an addictive substance rather than searching for inspiration. The tone is very patronising in places. God is shoved into practically every other sentence, verging on proselytising in several places.

To summarise, she’s not going to be making my Christmas card list.

However, I do have to confess that some of it is quite useful, so I’m plodding along, if only because I don’t have a better plan right at this moment in time. Today though, I got to the instructions for week four: word deprivation.

Yes, this week I am supposed to read NOTHING. NADA. ZIP. I sat down and worked out what would be banned in consequence: any internet use including RSS feeds, twitter and IM; books and magazines (obviously); podcasts and audiobooks (because that’s clearly just replacing books with spoken words instead of written ones); reading to the children. Shit, that’s pretty much everything I do.

I’m also not even sure that’s even physically possible for me. On Weekend Luddite days my first reaction is to reach for a book. I survive utterly boring household chores by listening to books and podcasts on my iPod. I can’t even get to sleep at night if I haven’t wound down for an hour with a book (audio or paperback). What an utterly joyless prospect.

I ranted at Akra that the entire premise was completely impossible. “So don’t do it,” he said. I explained that rather defeated the object of dragging myself through this whole course kicking and screaming. “So do it,” he replied. That’s about as helpful as he gets.

So I’m doing it. Monday to Friday only, because I think I’ll be dangerously close to depression by the end of five days, let alone seven. I’m interpreting it as “no reading for pleasure”, so chores will still get done, as will my blog posting and Project 365 on Flickr. Only automated updates will be showing on Twitter or Facebook for the week, though. IM will be switched off. Important emails and various paperwork will still be done. Effectively my Internet use for the week will be a write-only medium.

I’ve ordered in extra gin and Southern Comfort.

(Thinking about it, it’s probably just as well that I’m familiar with the structure of a 12-step programme now, isn’t it?)