… whatever you’re celebrating, have fun!

Me? I’m going to be cosy inside scoffing chocolate and having a last minute panic about NaNoWriMo. Yes, it starts tomorrow.

This blog will be completely focussed on NaNo for the whole month of November (simply because the thought of giving myself even more wordage pressure on top of the 2000 words a day gives me the willies). You’ll be able to view what’s been written so far using the NaNoWriMo menu on the left menu bar (under Projects) but I’ll also post summaries of how I’m doing and have various different “themes” in the main blog – so still plenty for you to read. I’ve decided a little while ago that I’m highly unlikely to publish this anywhere (well, for a start, I’ll be “publishing” it here, which might possibly cause complications anyway depending on who you believe) so I intend to have some fun with it. Don’t feel you have to read each day’s 2000 words – I can pretty much guarantee that 90% of them will be absolute dross and the other 10% will be the monkeys at typewriters effect…

I already have my first dare – so let’s see if I can fit both Batman and exploding death robots into the very first chapter, shall we?

The last two days, I’ve been coping better. I’m now eleven weeks pregnant (3 more weeks before I reach the supposedly “blooming” state of second trimester) and I’m starting to feel a teeny tiny bit more energetic. Not much mind you… I’m still tired – just “had a late night” sort of tired rather than a “I’m about to keel over where I stand can you PLEASE just leave me alone while I go to a darkened room and sleep for a hundred years” sort of tired.

Maybe my body has started to get used to the progesterone poisoning. Or maybe this is just a blip and I’ll be shattered again tomorrow.

I hope it’s not, because the tiredness was seriously beginning to destroy all useful brain function. Meal planning, Akra Jr entertaining, writing anything at all let alone of any quality, having a simple conversation where words were strung together correctly were all becoming a distant memory. Well, that’s if I could remember anything. So I’m hoping that I’ll actually feel mentally capable of NaNoWriMo by Saturday. It really was starting to fill me with dread.

Free fragrance samples – I love them, which is odd because I’m not big on wearing scent and very rarely remember to use any. I just love the little bottles.

Only, they don’t come in decent bottles anymore, do they? They’re those silly little stoppered vials where by the time you’ve got the lid off, most of the perfume is scattered across the carpet.

The bottles I used to love were the ones I had as a kid. When I was little, my mother had a cleaner come around who was also an Avon lady in her spare time. She was a great cleaner – very patient of the precocious little me – stopping her work to watch my latest dance or see my newest painting (hey, give me a break, I was only 6 or 7). Then again, she probably got paid by the hour so had the last laugh.

The major perk of her coming around for me (obviously, my mum got a clean house out of it) was the free samples. I presume mum must have been a good customer or she just took pity on me, I’m not sure which. I never got any lipstick samples or anything like that (perhaps she didn’t think it was appropriate little girls wearing makeup? or maybe my mum swiped them first) but that didn’t matter as I had my eye on the scent bottles.

They were glorious shapes, beautifully made various sized glass containers that I could carefully line up on my bedroom table. None of these silly stoppers, they all had proper screw lids and some even had little tiny rollerball applicators – so much more sensible. I felt terribly grown up having perfumes with exotic names such as “foxfire” – the smell was probably dire but six year olds aren’t well known for their taste in fine fragrances. Not that I ever WORE them… I couldn’t possibly have them run out on me – what would I line up on the dressing table otherwise?!

Of course, it’s probably not very environmentally friendly to have ornate sample bottles anymore. Far more practical to issue out the little vials which only have one use before you have to go out and spend a small fortune on a slightly bigger bottle. It’s just not the same…

Potty training is going great, she says through gritted teeth having changed Akra Jr’s clothing 8 times today. He’s wet himself again, and refusing to get changed again so I’m not making a battle of it (will take him up for a bath in a minute but in the meantime desperately hoping that he’ll realise soon being wet is uncomfortable).

We were making considerable progress yesterday. He can “hold it” for up to 3 hours, and had got the hang of knowing he needed to get to the potty (even if not all of it managed to get *in* the potty) but he seems to have regressed today. Partially because he’s been wearing trousers as well as pants (before we’ve let him run around in just pants) and I wonder if that’s meant he’s “forgotten” he’s not in a nappy and can’t just wee as he goes.

I will persevere though, I’m pretty sure from the progress made he is “ready” – but just needs more time than the supposed week to get the hang of it…

… why I keep having the doorbell ring and nobody’s there.

We’ve recently replaced our doorbell because the old one was a bit dodgy about ringing at all. Now the new one keeps going off when no-one’s about. I’ve just twigged that it always coincides with someone entering next-door’s house. We must have the same doorbell set on the same frequency and be too close by!

BAH. Back to Homebase…

In a fit of organisation this morning, we’ve been running around setting all the clocks. To set the clock for the video we had to switch the TV on. What we didn’t have to do was flick through all the channels while we were there. Much to our delight we’ve discovered that VH1 are playing the “Worst Number 1s EVER” this morning. What’s a bit disturbing is that we’ve been happily singing along to the last two…

… we obviously have no musical taste whatsoever.

Currently playing: “It’s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To” – Dave Stewart With Barbara Gaskin. Yay!

Edit: Nooooooooooooooooo…. I can’t believe they think “Doctor Who” – Timelords is in the top 40 Worst Number 1s!!! That song is ace!

With it being half term, Akra Jr being two and a half, and having settled down from house moving stress, it seemed to be the ideal time to tackle The Potty Training. The big boy pants were carefully picked out, the sticker chart constructed, towels laid under the potties (two – one for upstairs, one for downstairs).

When people talk about how they couldn’t go through the nappy stage again, I have to admit I just don’t understand the problem. Nappies are easy. You wrap one around their bottom and then all you have to do is remember to change it from time to time. Potties and toilets have so much more potential to go horribly, horribly wrong. So, filled with trepidation, I armed myself with a potting training in a week guide, then chose to start on a weekend so Akra could do the bulk of the work! *evil grin*

It’s been such hard going today too. Akra Jr at first thrived on all the attention we were giving him and loved to sit and be read to. However, midday came and went and we’d had three mop up sessions and nothing on target. Worse, Akra Jr was now getting pretty fed up at having to sit on the potty every 15 minutes or so, and being quite vocal about it. I started considering dropping it for a while and trying again in the Christmas Hols.

Then came the magical moment where by sheer statistical likelihood, we managed to time it right. Big cheers, lots of hugs, ceremonial stickers, phone call to Grandma to tell her what a big boy he was. It got a lot easier from there.

He’s now having a bath and will have a nappy put on with his pyjamas, thank God. Tally for today is Accidents 9 Potty 7. I never knew one little boy could hold so much liquid. I so wish I wasn’t pregnant so I could go pour myself a very large glass of wine.

Anyway, please excuse me. I have about 3 loads of washing to do to prepare for tomorrow…

Half Term has crept up on us quickly. It only seems like yesterday that we were desperate for all the things to start up after the eternity that was the summer. Yet again, we face everything closing down for next week (here it seems that everything is geared around the school terms – not many activities that continue through holidays) but at least it’s for only a week and this time we know some people.

I’m stunned at how much Akra Jr has changed in just half a term. Whether it’s the natural consequence of being closer to two and a half or the intensive socialization we’ve done to get established in the area, I don’t know. Probably a bit of both. Our lives have been a whirl of library visits, Tumble Tots, Nursery School and Playgroup.

As a result, Akra Jr’s conversational skills have really taken off, he’s started to chat about the children he’s played with during the afternoon (a weird feeling when you haven’t met the children concerned yourself at any point), and he’s often aware when someone’s upset or hurt. He has a better memory for names than I do. He’s far more confident physically, will run off and play in the playground without me having to guide him around and loves climbing. He joins in with action songs whereas before he’d always be a bit shy and hang back.

I’m looking forward to seeing what changes the next half term brings.

Edit: Daisy has reminded me that I have this photo to put up…

What did I think I was doing planning for and conceiving another child? All of a sudden, it just doesn’t seem such a great idea any more and I’m going to be responsible for turning our comfortable family life completely upside down for completely selfish reasons.

How could I do this to Akra Jr? He’s such a brilliant kid, he’s doing something new just about every single day at the moment – it’s such an exciting age. I’m loving the time I’ve got to devote to him and him only (well, most days). I hate the fact that I seem to run out of energy so quickly in the day – the new baby is already encroaching on the attention he’s due and it’s not even born yet! I have no experience of how siblings interact – I am an only child. And I just can’t imagine ever loving the faceless stranger that’s yet to arrive even half as much as I love Akra Jr.

I’m starting to remember all the stress that was involved with having a young baby the last time: feeling suffocated by all the health visitors and midwives who all seem to have differing advice (most of it stuck in the dark ages); the exhaustion of sleep deprivation. Truth be told, I really didn’t enjoy the baby stage much – it starts getting good when there’s more interaction, when you’re feeling less like a personal slave and dairy cow. It doesn’t help that everything I read stresses how difficult the transition from 1 child to 2 is. One analogy someone used was the difference between having 1 child to having 2 children was the same difference between being a pet owner and a zoo keeper!

I’m also only just starting to get an identity back. Akra Jr is becoming that tiniest bit more independent so I’ve been discovering “me” again. Having interests outside of being Mummy. Now, I’m throwing all that away again for a few more years. Will there be enough “me” to go around?!

I know all these fears are “normal” – the second time around you don’t have the luxury of imagining the future as glossy magazine parenthood. You know the birth is going to hurt – more pain than you can ever imagine. You know just how exhausting it is and how much hard work it’s all going to be. Your illusions are well and truly shattered – you’ve given in and aiming for being a “good enough” parent over a “perfect” parent. Knowing it’s “normal” doesn’t really help with dealing with it though.

Don’t get me wrong, I still very much want this baby. I’d just like to be blissfully ignorant again. Please.

I’ve started to loathe pelican crossings.

For a while now, I’ve been chatting to Akra Jr about the significance of the red and green men on pedestrian crossings all in the interests of good mummying brownie points when it comes to road safety. He took to the concept very quickly, and enjoys looking out for the green man and telling me it’s safe to cross.

All well and good. So what’s the problem? The problem is Worcester Council are shite at setting up the light timings. Even the busiest crossings take forever and a day to change; I feel like a right lemon standing there waiting for the sodding green man while the world and his wife launches themselves off the pavement in front of us, perfectly aware that there’s no cars coming for miles around. Some even have the audacity to glare at us for having a pushchair taking up all that kerb launching space.

I can see that road safety training isn’t going to go down so well with Akra Jr for very long. Sooner than I expect, he’ll be wondering why we have to wait for the damn light while everyone else completely ignores it. I’ve read that a child isn’t able to judge distances accurately until they’re quite old (7? 9? can’t find any references to it on a brief google) so I’m sure this is a Bad Thing [tm].

Plus, I’m getting bored standing there…